The Will of God

We all know that I've been having a hard time lately, it's definitely not a secret. When we started trying to have a family I was very naive. I just assumed we would get pregnant quickly in the way that most people do. When I learned we would have to do IVF I was still naive. I just assumed that it would work. I went for it with all that was in me. We were blessed with #1 because despite losing a twin, we have Chase. So in a way I was still naive. IVFs #2 and #3 were tough because they didn't work. I wasn't naive anymore. I had been slapped with the reality that nothing was a given, but I refused to give up. Then there was IVF #4. I knew that there was the possibility that it might not work, but it did. I was in heaven. Then we lost the twins and that about did me in. Some days I really wonder if I can do this again and then other days I'm yearning to do it again as soon as we can. We will do it again, there is no doubt really. I'll have an HSG on November 20th, I'll start BCPs in December, we'll do shots in January and then hopefully get a some awesome news in February. Hopefully.

I received the following in an email and it just really hit home right now.

When God takes something from your grasp, He's not punishing you, but merely opening your hands to receive something better.

"The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you."




**I am grateful for
1) November
2) playing games with Chase
3) sidewalk chalk
4) sunshine and cool breezes
5) hugs with noise (i.e. the kind where you squeeze so tight you get a little grunt)